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This Ain't No Teddy Bear's Picnic, by Laura Louise Stewart

16/5/2016

4 Comments

 

​If you go down to the woods tonight

You better go in disguise
If you go down to the woods tonight
You may get a bad surprise...
Illustration © 2016 Chris Riddell funny poems on the funeverse
Illustration © 2016 Chris Riddell

For there in the thick of the gnarliest trees
The bears are all meeting where nobody sees
And this ain't no picnic, no honey-bears laugh
Whatever you do, don't stray from the path

They've crept from their caves, in wild,distant lands
Come down from the mountains, to talk through their plans
Escaped from the zoos, where they've watched from their cages
And bring ancient wisdom passed down through the ages


​From the grizzlies and cubs in the far northern climes

To toothsome big beasts of our nursery rhymes
And the bears in the books wearing striped scarves or ties
To the teddies who stare from our beds with glass eyes

Yes, their time is coming, to the woods near you
hey know what they know and they'll do what they do
Bears of all colours, all sizes, all claws
They're coming, each bear that ever there was


So if you must go to the woods tonight

you better not go alone
No really, don't go to the woods tonight

it's better to stay safe at home


Poem © 2016 Laura Louise Stewart
Illustration © 2016 
Chris Riddell


Illustration © 2016 Chris Riddell funny poems on the funeverse
Illustration © 2016 Chris Riddell
4 Comments
Elise
31/5/2016 05:58:27 pm

Oh my bear
Come over here
Don't drop your scarf
In the barf

Reply
Maureen Lynas
31/5/2016 07:08:08 pm

Ha, Elise! That's a yuck rhyme! Love it. Thanks for sharing!

Reply
Elise
31/5/2016 10:42:22 pm

Oh my bear
Go over there
But be careful
Do not drop your scarf
In the barf

Reply
Laura Stewart
20/6/2016 06:19:31 pm

Gross! Great poem Elise, this bear certainly looks like he is worried, so maybe it is about the nearby barf!

Reply



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