Funny Poet - Kathryn Evans
Kathryn Evans writes stories for children of all ages and is represented by Sophie at the Sophie Hicks Agency. More of Me, her debut YA novel has recently been released:
“Set to be the young adult must-read this year.”
Lancashire Evening Post
“A gripping thriller with a sinister sci-fi edge.”
The Bookseller
Kathryn is a passionate supporter of SCBWI British Isles - a brilliant organisation for children's book writers and illustrators.
Kathryn is available for secondary school visits and festivals.
“Set to be the young adult must-read this year.”
Lancashire Evening Post
“A gripping thriller with a sinister sci-fi edge.”
The Bookseller
Kathryn is a passionate supporter of SCBWI British Isles - a brilliant organisation for children's book writers and illustrators.
Kathryn is available for secondary school visits and festivals.
I Am Not a Poet

I am not a poet
I just don't have the time,
You'll find I'm far too busy,
To ever speak in rhyme.
I also don't like chocolate
That simply isn't me,
I don't like cake or cheese or crisps,
Or drinking cups of tea.
I don't like fluffy puppy dogs,
I don't like clever cats,
I've got no time for chickens,
But I'm really fond of rats.
I never tell a lie,
I'd find that really weird,
Now forgive me while I eat this toad
And manicure my beard.
Other Stuff About Kathryn: She loves fencing - that's fighting with swords not putting up wooden walls. She belly dances too - so many sequins, so little time. She has a house full of crazy animals: a smelly dog, a grumpy cat, chickens that peck her toes and gerbils that are studying geography. The geography of her son's bedroom every time they manage to escape.
Kathryn doesn't just write books and poetry. She does shopping lists too, and little notes to remind herself to go to the dentist. Some of her dentist notes are really quite brilliant:
Dear me, don't forget to go to the dentist or your teeth will fall out.
Because it is very important to look after your teeth, and because Kathryn is extremely generous and lovely, she says you may borrow that note free of charge.
I just don't have the time,
You'll find I'm far too busy,
To ever speak in rhyme.
I also don't like chocolate
That simply isn't me,
I don't like cake or cheese or crisps,
Or drinking cups of tea.
I don't like fluffy puppy dogs,
I don't like clever cats,
I've got no time for chickens,
But I'm really fond of rats.
I never tell a lie,
I'd find that really weird,
Now forgive me while I eat this toad
And manicure my beard.
Other Stuff About Kathryn: She loves fencing - that's fighting with swords not putting up wooden walls. She belly dances too - so many sequins, so little time. She has a house full of crazy animals: a smelly dog, a grumpy cat, chickens that peck her toes and gerbils that are studying geography. The geography of her son's bedroom every time they manage to escape.
Kathryn doesn't just write books and poetry. She does shopping lists too, and little notes to remind herself to go to the dentist. Some of her dentist notes are really quite brilliant:
Dear me, don't forget to go to the dentist or your teeth will fall out.
Because it is very important to look after your teeth, and because Kathryn is extremely generous and lovely, she says you may borrow that note free of charge.