UnEGGspected by Dom Conlon

I thought I’d woken up at dawn
but apparently I’d just been born.
I’d only planned to walk and eat
as I waddled off on tiny feet.
I slipped, I slid, and then I fell
and looking back I saw my shell
all broken up upon my nest 
and then I knew I’d never rest
until I fixed it up again.

Illustration © 2017 Nick Butterworth

I set to work with spit and glue
and tried to make it good as new.
I filled the gaps and every slit
and, like a jigsaw, made it fit
just good enough to climb inside
when I became all sleepy-eyed.
But when I heard a mighty WHACK,
I felt my egg shell split and crack
and that’s what woke me up again.

Then this is what I found so rude–
a human child thought I was FOOD!
It seemed as though I would be fed
by being served upon some bread,
but as I reached up to head height
I gave its nose a nasty bite
that sent it running to its mum
and for a laugh I bit its bum
then settled in my egg again.

Poem © 2017 Dom Conlon
Illustration © 2017 Nick Butterworth

Illustration © 2017 Nick Butterworth