Blog Archives

When there's call for a mop,
Uncle Joe is the top,
The grubbiest house he'll make gleam.

He's a right nifty mover,
When moving a hoover,
There's no rug that man cannot clean.

If a surface is dusty,
Or rusty or crusty,
With soap and a cloth he'll add sheen.

0 Comments

Author For Hire

25/2/2017

7 Comments

I'm Will, with the quill. An author of skill, Who'll write something brill, For a shilling...

7 Comments

Nathaniel Pott's Emporium by Jo Dearden

23/2/2017

1 Comment

Nathaniel Pott’s Emporium
has toys and games galorium
stacked ceiling high to floorium
You won’t believe your eyes!

With treasures to explorium
such pleasures lie in storium
we’re sure that you’ll adorium
Why don’t you step inside…

1 Comment

Lord Montague's Mice by George Kirk

20/2/2017

2 Comments

Lord Montague Herbert DeLacy Fitzroy
Had lived in his mansion since he was a boy.
It had twenty six bedrooms, a ballroom as well,
A block full of stables, a clock tower bell.
It had four poster beds, and its own indoor plumbing,
Its pillars and columns were really quite stunning.
But one thing it had that wasn’t so nice,
A large infestation of manor house mice.

2 Comments

Fish by Katherine Lynas

16/2/2017

0 Comments

See this fish in my pocket?
Isn't it fine?
Bet you wish it was yours,
But it isn't,
It's mine.

Poem © 2017 Katherine Lynas
Illustration ©2017 Nick Butterworth

0 Comments

My Grandad Loves to Skateboard by Julie Anna Douglas

14/2/2017

5 Comments

My groovy Grandad loves to skateboard
up and down our street,
balanced carefully on just one hand
instead of on his feet.

He's a record breaking break-dancer
who likes a bit of tap.
He listens to heavy metal tunes
but loves to sing a rap.

5 Comments

Mr Muscle by Jo Dearden

11/2/2017

0 Comments

Our Dad was on a mission
to get the housework done
He said he’d do a proper job…
…much better than our Mum

He chose his weapons wisely
Some Cif and Toilet Duck
They’d come in very handy for
a one man war on muck

He fought the fusty front room
with a cloud of scented spray
And ran around in just his vest
and yelled, “Yippee Ki Yay!”

Funny housework poem from the funeverse by Jo Dearden

0 Comments

UnEGGspected by Dom Conlon

9/2/2017

0 Comments

I thought I’d woken up at dawn
but apparently I’d just been born.
I’d only planned to walk and eat
as I waddled off on tiny feet.
I slipped, I slid, and then I fell
and looking back I saw my shell
all broken up upon my nest
and then I knew I’d never rest
until I fixed it up again.

0 Comments

The Snow Duck, by Lesley Moss

6/2/2017

0 Comments

One floating frozen feather of snow
falls, then another, and and off I go...
I slip, I stutter, I flutter my wings.
The world is full of freezing things.
I slide - I glide - I spin on my toes,
I lift my wings and strike a pose.
In the stillness, silence grows.

0 Comments

The Astounding Mouse-ecco by Mo O'Hara

2/2/2017

2 Comments

The Astounding Mouse-ecco,
Who dove in Prosecco,
Prepared for his most daring dive.

The bubbles, he claimed,
Were more soft than Champagne.
Twas the secret for how he survived.

But alas on this day,
He'd forgotten to pay,
And his glass was filled up with plain water.

He was still unaware,
As he dove with great flare.
Now his act is performed by his daughter.

Poem © 2017 Mo O'Hara
Illustration © 2017 Nick Butterworth

2 Comments

Hoover Mover by Kathryn Evans

When there's call for a mop,
Uncle Joe is the top,
The grubbiest house he'll make gleam.

He's a right nifty mover,
When moving a hoover,
There's no rug that man cannot clean.

If a surface is dusty,
Or rusty or crusty,
With soap and a cloth he'll add sheen.

Author For Hire

Nathaniel Pott's Emporium by Jo Dearden

Lord Montague's Mice by George Kirk

Fish by Katherine Lynas

My Grandad Loves to Skateboard by Julie Anna Douglas

Mr Muscle by Jo Dearden

UnEGGspected by Dom Conlon

The Snow Duck, by Lesley Moss

The Astounding Mouse-ecco by Mo O'Hara

KIDS!
We would absolutely
LOVE IT
if you added your own funny poems in the comments.
Especially if you are
A CHILD
WITH A FUNNYBONE!

Poets and tags

Archives

blog

funeverse guests

Poets on the funeverse

​When there's call for a mop,Uncle Joe is the top,The grubbiest house he'll make gleam.He's a right nifty mover,When moving a hoover,There's no rug that man cannot clean.If a surface is dusty, Or rusty or crusty, With soap and a cloth he'll add sheen.

KIDS!We would absolutelyLOVE IT if you added your own funny poems in the comments.​Especially if you are A CHILD​WITH A FUNNYBONE!

Poets and tags

Archives

blog

funeverse guests

Poets on the funeverse

When there's call for a mop,
Uncle Joe is the top,
The grubbiest house he'll make gleam.

He's a right nifty mover,
When moving a hoover,
There's no rug that man cannot clean.

If a surface is dusty,
Or rusty or crusty,
With soap and a cloth he'll add sheen.

KIDS!
We would absolutely
LOVE IT
if you added your own funny poems in the comments.
Especially if you are
A CHILD
WITH A FUNNYBONE!